Negotiation News  May 2007

If you know someone who could benefit from the information in this email, please pass this message on to a friend.

1. Socrates Has Nothing On You If a picture is worth a thousand words, a good question is worth ten thousand words to a skilled negotiator. I'm not kidding, and if I am exaggerating, it's not by much. Questions are so important, so capable of making or breaking a negotiation, so subtle-and yet so overlooked by most negotiators. Oh, we ask questions, sure. Lots of them. But do we think about them ahead of time? Are they carefully crafted to produce useful answers? Or are we just out there winging it, hoping to get lucky? In my experience, most negotiators are just winging it. They don't understand the value of good questions, they don't know how to ask good questions, they don't know how to listen to the answers. As a result, they will never accomplish what they can and should. That's the bad news. The good news is that the solution is at hand. You will already be better with your questions ten minutes from now, when you have finished this article. Take to heart the principles I lay out here, work with them, practice, use the results in your negotiations, and you will see the results. Let's get the ball rolling with a look at the courtroom grilling that is standard fare in television dramas. The D.A. bores in with the questions: Isn't it true, Mr. Smithers, that you bought a Smith & Wesson in June, 2006? Isn't it true that on the night in question….? Isn't it true that you then climbed out the window and….? What's the point of all these questions? Intimidation, throw the witness onto the defensive, hope for a Perry Mason-style breakdown and confession right on the stand. Sometimes it works, at least on television. In a negotiation, it never works. Here's what does work: "No, Pete, I don't mind hearing that. I want you to tell me what's wrong. How can I tighten this proposal for you?" "I don't really see that they're much of an issue but-how important are delivery dates?" "I know you're the team leader, Franklin. Do we have everyone onboard? How does Mary fit into the picture?" "I know this has been a difficult situation for both of us, Jack, but how do you want me to take that?" Back to Top   2. News from The Jim Camp Group We are excited to announce our new web site at www.startwithno.com. Announcing new developments that are just the beginning. My new book from Crown, "No: The Only Negotiating Strategy You Need for Work and Home" is available for pre-order. It will be out June 17, 2007. Read an excerpt, enjoy the early testimonials, pre-order a copy from Amazon at http://www.startwithno.com/nobook.html or call us to order multiple copies and enjoy a great bonus from us. Our new online store has three CD series with more than 20 hours of training for you. They include my complete 3 day negotiations coaching clinic recorded live with real clients. Training you can listen to driving to work or flying around the world. Is prospecting and cold calling killing you with stress? No more. Learn prospecting and cold calling on our one-of-a-kind 8 hour CD program and I guarantee the stress will go away. Learn where real success comes from with our proprietary daily track self-management success secrets 6 hour CD program. Check them out here http://www.startwithno.com/store.html. Back to Top 3. Is Your Need Killing You? When was the last time you cut your price because the other side just didn't seem convinced? You might have even said the words, "they have no need, if we don't lower the price we will lose this deal." If this has happened or does happen your need is killing you. When someone asks for just a few minutes of your time, what do you see in them? Need. Where does their need come from? Fear of failure. Fear of you saying no to spending time listening to their discussion or presentation. If you give them those few minutes what do they do? They start telling you in a high fast voice and before you know it bingo they gush need all over you. What do you do? Maybe you dismiss them completely as a waste of your time. Or just maybe they have something you want. So you frown, shake your head no, or you turn away just a little to pretend to not want it, no need. Their needy little voice tells them to keep talking, don't lose them. That same little voice says throw in a discount or offer them two for the price of one. Again you pretend no interest, you actually pretend to want to leave. Now their little needy voice is screaming in their ear, give a deeper discount. When you are happy with yourself and your dominating negotiation performance and have won all you feel you want you make the deal. I know this seems like an exaggeration, but I think the vision is clear. It is happening everyday somewhere out there. In negotiation our success or failure often hinges on how we're perceived by the respected opponent, the adversary. How we look to them brings reactions from them. Their perception creates mindsets and thought processes in them that move the negotiation as they see it. So if we appear to have no need and to be confident, effective, calm, focused, successful, comfortable and under complete control the negotiation will proceed at a reasonable pace with effective decision making on level ground. But, if we appear needy for the deal by talking loud and fast or not letting them get a word in edge wise, watch out, the big compromise is coming or the deal is going so far south you will never recover. Why is this all so true? Look Camp, why don't others who write negotiation books address this in their writing? Well, I don't know about them but I will tell you this, to be needy in a negotiation is deadly. To see it all you have to do is study history. The Camp System of Negotiation is designed to eliminate this very human emotional trait. You see no one can escape it. Humans are driven by emotions and by definition are preditors of the worst kind. Who do predators attack? Predators attack the needy, the weak, the cripple, they don't attack the strong. If you don't have our system here are a few ways to help you not show need. Stop talking. Slow your pace when you do talk. Lower your voice. Sit back in your chair. Listen and take good notes. Say no every chance you have. Don't leave long winded messages. Don't leave more than one message. Don't take the first time offered for the meeting. Don't chase the deal. Close the file and mean it. Remember, you want the deal you don't need the deal. Back to Top

*** Thanks for reading! *** Would you like for a coach to call you right now? Email jcamp@startwithno.com and enter your phone number in the body of the message. Until next month, Jim Camp Systematic Decision-Based Negotiation 614-764-0213 http://www.startwithno.com If you know someone who could benefit from the information in this email, please pass this message on to a friend. Questions, comments, or suggestions about this newsletter? Contact jcamp@startwithno.com

To cancel your subscription, send an email to jcamp@startwithno.com with your request. Or contact us by mail at 2046 Treasure Coast Place #186, Vero Beach, FL 32960, USA Copyright The Jim Camp Group 2007